Farewell My Love
by aussieforgood
Summary: Sara is tired of facing death every day and has decided to take a break. Spoilerish for 8x07. This story has been based on the 3 promo pics from Goodbye and Good Luck and the Goodbye Sara promo from CBS, no real spoilers were used.


**A/N:** Although I've read all the spoilers and know what's gonna happen I haven't used any of them here, I've based this story on the 3 promo pics we got from Goodbye and Good Luck and the goodbye Sara promo from CBS.

Very special thanks to my wonderful beta and dear friend **Maisy13**. _(You can blame her and spell check for any mistakes you find, I know that I've made a lot of them.)_ :P

**Disclaimer**: I don't own CSI or any of the characters, if I did then Sara wouldn't be leaving next week _**sob**_ and Grissom would be lying in bed next to me & I'd be having my _(very many)_ ways with him.

_Maybe I should take him hostage until TPTB bring Sara back :)_

I hope you all enjoy this and if you cry then my work here is done.

* * *

Farewell My Love

Sara rolled over to face a peacefully sleeping Grissom, she couldn't sleep. It had been the same every night since her abduction and now after their last case she felt like she couldn't take it anymore. There were all these what if's running through her mind, what if she had drowned underneath that red mustang, what if Nick hadn't spotted her in the desert, what if... how would he take loosing her.

She knew it wasn't his fault that she was kidnapped, but what if something like this happened to her again, she couldn't put Grissom through something like that another time, she loved him too much.

She'd known from the beginning that the last 2 years were too good to be true. She had never known happiness in her life, not as a child, not in foster care and not even in college. She had never known what true love really was. Yes she'd had her share of boyfriends during high school and college but they'd never really loved her and she'd never loved them back.

It wasn't until she'd been a CSI for a little over a year that she'd fallen in love for the first & last time. She had begged her supervisor to let her go to the forensics seminar and he'd only said yes to get her to stop pestering him. The moment she laid eyes on the lecturer she was in love, and as soon as he was finished and everyone had left she'd approached him and started asking him questions about forensics, insects and anthropology, and he'd answered all her questions. She was trying to work up the nerve to ask him out but he asked first, and she of course said yes.

They spent the whole week he was there together taking walks around the city, having lunch and dinner together, talking about anything and everything. Then he had to go back to Vegas and he promised to keep in touch. They emailed each other daily and talked on the phone every week for a year, then one day he told her that he needed her help and she dropped everything and took the first flight out to Vegas, and when he'd asked her to stay she didn't hesitate for one second.

The next 5 years were torture, she flirted with him, he flirted with her, she and Greg were almost killed in an explosion at the lab, she'd asked him out and he'd said no, she'd overheard him confessing to a suspect that he couldn't risk everything he'd ever worked for to have her, almost getting fired, being held hostage by a psycho at a mental hospital and Nick's kidnapping.

After that fateful day she was finally his and he was finally hers, they'd had their ups and downs at the beginning of their relationship. They were both loners and it took some time for them to get used to sharing their life with each other, but in the end everything worked out for the best and she'd never been happier. That was until Natalie came along and tried to kill her to get back at Grissom.

Sara sighed and got out of bed, careful not to wake Grissom, and made her way to the study passing Hank, who lifted his head lazily looked at her and then went back to sleep.

When they'd adopted Hank, Sara had wanted to change his name but Grissom refused to. He said that even though he shared her ex boyfriend's name that it was no reason to confuse the poor dog, who had gone all his life by Hank.

Sara sat down at Grissom's desk, and sighed again, she'd made her decision. It was something that she'd been thinking about for a while now, and as much as it broke her heart, tonight she'd decided to go through with it. She just hoped that Grissom would understand why she was doing this. She pulled out a pen and paper and started to write…

* * *

Grissom woke up to an empty bed; he wasn't surprised, this had been happening for weeks now. He knew something was bothering Sara but he didn't want to push her; he knew that she'd tell him what was bothering her when she was ready. 

Earlier that day Greg had wanted to tell him something important about Sara but he was called away before Greg could say anything. He wondered if maybe Sara had confided in Greg and told him what was bothering her but why would she tell Greg and not him, she knew she could tell him anything didn't she?

Grissom got up and started looking for Sara. He usually found her in the living room watching TV, but tonight the TV was off and she wasn't there, he started looking for her in all the rooms until he found her in the study.

* * *

She'd just finished writing the letter when she heard footsteps coming towards her, Sara quickly tucked the letter away in her pocket and picked up one of Grissom's entomology text books and pretended to read. 

When he got to the door she looked up at him and smiled, "Hey, did I wake you?"

Grissom smiled back at her and shook his head. He decided that now was the time to try and get her to talk to him "Honey, I know something's on your mind, please tell me what it is, maybe I can help."

Sara got up and walked towards him, she put her arms around him and planted a kiss on his lips, "Nothing's wrong babe, I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to wake you so I came down here to read." She took his hand and led him back to the bedroom, "Let's go back to bed." She said with a wink.

* * *

Grissom didn't know why but all week he'd been feeling uneasy and he couldn't shake the feeling. Greg had told him about the talk he'd had with Sara and he knew that she was heading towards a burnout and there was nothing he could do. She still wouldn't tell him what was bothering her, even though he already knew what it was thanks to Greg, and when he tried to talk to her about it she'd quickly change the subject. 

He still woke up and found her either awake staring at the ceiling or downstairs reading or watching TV. She still refused to admit something was bothering her and would go back up with him and pretend to sleep.

* * *

Sara decided that tonight was the night, she couldn't do this anymore, facing death everyday and knowing that what she did wasn't even lowering the crime rate in Vegas. She'd tried to talk herself out of it, she didn't want to break Grissom's heart but she knew that this was something she had to do. 

Sara had packed what she needed earlier that day before Grissom came back home from shift and put the small suitcase in her car. He'd come home, they'd made love and he'd fallen asleep, she on the other hand couldn't sleep thinking about what she was about to do. When it was time for shift she got up, showered, dressed and headed for work.

* * *

Sara looked at her watch, it was almost time for graveyard to start and swing to finish. She quickly made her way into Grissom's office before he got in and left the letter on his desk. She wanted to get out of the lab before Grissom got in, it would be easier this way. She knew if she saw him that she'd never be able to say goodbye to him without breaking down and crying. 

She headed to the locker room to change and grab her things; she sat down on the bench for one last time to think if this was really the right thing to do.

She got up and opened her locker grabbing her things, just as she was about to close the door a photo caught her eye, it was taken only a few weeks previously, the day they got married, Grissom knew how Sara felt about weddings so they decided to make it simple and quick and tied the knot at city hall. Sara smiled at the memory, it had been the happiest day of her life and looking at that picture now and remembering made what she wanted to do even harder.

She closed her locker quickly and headed out of the locker room, she needed to get out of the lab before he got in, but as she was walking out she ran into him.

Grissom caught her before she fell, putting his arms around her waist and pulling her into him. "Where are you off to in such a hurry my dear?" he asked as he planted a kiss on her forehead.

Sara looked into his deep blue eyes for one last time before answering, "I was on my way to your office, I wanted to see you before I went home."

She hated lying to him, but she couldn't tell him the truth now, he was going to find out soon anyway.

Grissom looked around and seeing nobody headed their way kissed her softly on her lips, after several seconds he lifted his head and whispered, "I'll see you in the morning, my love."

Tears were beginning to form in Sara's eyes and she knew she had to go before he saw them, she smiled, gave him a quick peck on the cheek and turned to leave, "I'll see you soon." she whispered back to him and with one last look at him she left.

* * *

After handing out assignments Grissom went back into his office, he wanted to call Sara before she went to sleep to make sure she got home alright. As soon as he sat down at his desk he caught site of a plain white envelope with his name printed neatly on top in Sara's handwriting. 

He didn't have to read what was written inside to know what it was about, he opened the envelope and pulled out two pieces of paper and started to read.

* * *

As her cab headed towards the airport Sara took one last look at Vegas, she was going to miss the lab and her friends but most of all she was going to miss Grissom, the only man she'd ever loved. 

She'd come back one day when she was ready and hoped that when that day came Grissom would at least be able to forgive her for leaving him the way she did.

Fin

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I hope you liked it…reviews are greatly appreciated. 


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